Saturday, September 21, 2013

Teens Trash A Home, But Don’t Mention It!

So I heard on the news the last couple of days about an ex-football player who’s house was broken into by 200-400 kids and while they were there, proceeded to vandalize and destroy his vacation home. They all partied and while partying thought it would be a bright idea to take pictures of themselves and post them for the entire world to see on Twitter and Instagram.

Thankfully, this ex-football player’s son was at college and started seeing photos of the house and the party on social media. I’m guessing that’s when the police were called.

Now, they graffitied his home, left all kind of trash, and from what I’ve gathered, caused around $20,000 worth of damages to the property. The worst part was someone stealing and eagle off his deceased grandchild’s headstone, which thankfully has been returned.

Here’s the rub for me…the parents.

The parents are mad that the ex-football player has created a website trying to track down these vandals. The website though, is to try to help these kids. He doesn’t want this happening again. The site is supposed to help these kids own up to what they’ve done and make things right. The parents though, they’re worried that this site will cause colleges to look poorly on their children.

Is it just me or have these parents lost their ever loving minds?

Their punk kid goes into this man’s home to drink underage, vandalize it, post it on social media for the entire world to see…and somehow this man is the issue? Has our society made such a shift that I find this incomprehensible? Did I just fall off the turnip truck and my mind is just to back woods to believe that somehow it might be the CHILD’S fault? Do the parents take any responsibility in the behavior of their child?

 

First, let’s look at this realistically. Colleges as well as companies are going online to look at social media when considering someone as a student or employee. It’s the way of the world today people. These colleges would’ve been able to see the “character” of these kids and that would’ve sealed the deal there.

Second, if the ex-football player found every single kid and pressed charges against each one, these kids would have records. Do the parents not think that colleges and employers would have access to those records? Hmmm, underage drinking, destruction of property, yada yada yada…pass!

These kids were the ones who made all of their pictures public record. They were the brilliant ones who outed themselves! It’s in the public domain parents! What world do you live on to think that no one saw what your kid was doing.

So, parents of these kids, where do you hold your kid accountable? When do you take them over to this man’s house to apologize and help him to start cleaning up the mess they made? When do YOU go to this man and apologize for your child’s behavior? What will it take for you to come down off of your high horse and realize your kid did something wrong.

Have you considered that the reason your kid thought this might be ok is because you don’t hold them accountable for their actions? That when they see you placing the blame somewhere else that it might send a message to them that, “yea, see, I wasn’t at fault, this guy is ruining my future.” Hence, they have a sense of entitlement? Is this how you want your child to grow up? Who you want your child to be? If you’re so concerned about their future, my suggestion is to start worrying about the here and now.

You should be more concerned about your child’s character as it is right now. Is their sense of entitlement causing them to not consider their actions and how those actions will affect others? I think you need to take a step back and realize that there’s something wrong with this situation and what part your family had in it.

I truly hope that this man will start to see families come forward, with their kid who made an extremely poor choice, and start to make amends. I know that kids can redeem themselves and they can do the right thing. My hope is, you’ll encourage “right” behaviors instead of worrying about college.

What would you do if you were the parent of one of the kids? Do you think the ex-football player was within his rights by trying to track down the kids, many of whom he knows?

4 comments:

April Grant said...

First of all, this wouldn't be my kid. Why? Because I think he's an angel? No. He knows that if he got caught vandalizing someone's home, he'd be made to pay it back, every dime of damage. Probably not $20k worth but maybe $5k and he'd personally do as much as could legally and physically do until the house is back to its original state. Finally he would have no social life for a year or so. No parties, no friends over, no phone calls. I'd pick him up and he'd be with me everyday.

For the other parents, I saw this long ago when I was a student teacher. Parents would blame teachers for their kids bad grades, be bothered that we interrupted them if their child was being a menace to other students and overall did not want to deal with them.

You are so right! The kids did this thinking they would get away scot free and the parents are doing their best to make sure that's true. Good for the football player taking control of his property and doing what he can do.

April Grant said...

First of all, this wouldn't be my kid. Why? Because I think he's an angel? No. He knows that if he got caught vandalizing someone's home, he'd be made to pay it back, every dime of damage. Probably not $20k worth but maybe $5k and he'd personally do as much as could legally and physically do until the house is back to its original state. Finally he would have no social life for a year or so. No parties, no friends over, no phone calls. I'd pick him up and he'd be with me everyday.

For the other parents, I saw this long ago when I was a student teacher. Parents would blame teachers for their kids bad grades, be bothered that we interrupted them if their child was being a menace to other students and overall did not want to deal with them.

You are so right! The kids did this thinking they would get away scot free and the parents are doing their best to make sure that's true. Good for the football player taking control of his property and doing what he can do.

Liz Mays said...

I can not stand the attitude of parents who think their children should be an exception? It infuriates me this whole change in parenting style. If they don't get into colleges because of what they did, well too bad. When you do something wrong and illegal like that, there ought to be consequences, REAL consequences! I'm on your page, Mimi.

Sorta Southern Single Mom said...

I completely agree. These kids made poor choices and made it public record on their own. Now they have to face the consequences. The parents are right to be upset, but their upset is misdirected. It should be with their children, not the homeowner.

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