Let me tell you something about Day 5 of the Love Dare. Fred exemplifies not being rude. He would never say anything off handed, off color, or downright mean about someone in front of another person. Even in private it’s more along the lines of, “she makes me mad.” Nothing at all like I’d say.
I believe one of the things I need to be mindful about is how I talk about him to others, even “jokingly”. I might be joking around by sort of cutting him down in front of our friends and making it sound funny, but for real? Is that funny? I’m definitely NOT characterized by this, but I know I could be. I could take my sarcasm too far and hurt Fred.
Also, do you know someone who is constantly quarrelsome? And I don’t mean look at me or point at me when you think of that someone. Think of someone else. Not Me!
I have become quarrelsome. blech Fred is constantly wondering what the next thing I’m going to gripe about will be. What will I be annoyed with. What has he done to upset me? What can’t he do right? If you can think of it, he’s probably wondered it in regards to me.
I don’t WANT to be that way, but that’s what I’ve become. I can blame it on any number of “rational” reasons, but in the end, it hasn’t done one lick of good. The only success I’ve had with my quarreling is push Fred away. Not the kind of success I want to brag about.
I know this chapter talks about how we can be ignorant which then leads to being self-centered. I see how unpleasant I can be to “live with” or date, but usually it’s not until AFTER the damage has been done. There’s a little test, 4 short questions and I would have to honestly say I failed at the questions. I’m definitely NOT lying to myself thinking that I don’t need to change in this area. I have a lot to learn from Fred about not being rude!
So, I got to ask Fred what 3 things cause him to be irritated and uncomfortable with me. He didn’t say anything that I expected. For me, I figured he would’ve taken it as a free for all to let me know exactly what he thought. He didn’t. Seriously, the dude never ceases to amaze me and be an example to me. Kinda pisses me off sometimes, but in a good way because it shows me where I need to grow. He can be a very good example, to say the least. =)
Do you ever find yourself being rude to your loved one? How do they respond?